DownBad
New Member
I was listening to midnight rain by Taylor swift. and I got flashbacks of somebody. and it hurts. genuinely my heart burns. wrote this whole thing in those 2 min 55 seconds midnight rain was playing. had to get it out.
2 years ago
I knew this girl. she was drop dead gorgeous yeah sure. But like idk how to say this without sounding like a dramatic idiot, she had this smile.
And it looked so fuckin beautiful. so fuckin beautiful istg.
i was pretty much down bad for her. I remember making a joke. and like ppl around me were either laughing or telling me im not as funny as I think I am. and she looks me dead in the eyes ( i hated how much she stared like..... dude I have a weak heart) and asked me "did u know that ur smile deviates to a side everytime u smile without faking it?"
I didnt know that btw. A week later I asked her out. she said smth abt her studies and rejected me. A few days later she asked me out. I said yes.
I started loving how much she stared. I liked the constellation, the 3 moles made on her face. I loved the way she always instantly realised I was looking at her smile instead of her eyes when she talked to me. I loved how she told me my smile doesnt deviate anymore when I speak to her, how disgustingly symmetrical it was.
we broke up 2 months after we got together. she asked me to break up with her. she didnt want to be the one to do it. I sort of understand why she did that. sort of selfish but she had every right to be.
I am a bad bf. like its a fact. idk how to act. idk how to react. when she speaks to me, looks me in the eye...my legs dont work. my arms flail around. idk what to do with my hands. I just exist. listening. nodding. I try to look her in the eyes but my gaze drifts. she instantly realises. ik it makes her sad but I am not in control. its like when u love someone so hard.so fuckin much u dont know how to show it. I had trouble responding. I missed the way we talked for hours before. I let the missed calls pile up. I would be far away from my phone planning on all the interesting convos i would have with her becuz i am scared she would find me boring one day. When we meet up i would try my hardest....my hardest. But her voice cuts me off.
"Why didnt you pick up?"
"I am sorry"
"Thats not a reason"
"I am sorry"
There is smth genuinely wrong with me. I could spend the rest of my life trying to figure it out. but then again. she is gone so what's the point. my smile just doesnt deviate anymore. disgustingly symmetric
2 years ago
I knew this girl. she was drop dead gorgeous yeah sure. But like idk how to say this without sounding like a dramatic idiot, she had this smile.
And it looked so fuckin beautiful. so fuckin beautiful istg.
i was pretty much down bad for her. I remember making a joke. and like ppl around me were either laughing or telling me im not as funny as I think I am. and she looks me dead in the eyes ( i hated how much she stared like..... dude I have a weak heart) and asked me "did u know that ur smile deviates to a side everytime u smile without faking it?"
I didnt know that btw. A week later I asked her out. she said smth abt her studies and rejected me. A few days later she asked me out. I said yes.
I started loving how much she stared. I liked the constellation, the 3 moles made on her face. I loved the way she always instantly realised I was looking at her smile instead of her eyes when she talked to me. I loved how she told me my smile doesnt deviate anymore when I speak to her, how disgustingly symmetrical it was.
we broke up 2 months after we got together. she asked me to break up with her. she didnt want to be the one to do it. I sort of understand why she did that. sort of selfish but she had every right to be.
I am a bad bf. like its a fact. idk how to act. idk how to react. when she speaks to me, looks me in the eye...my legs dont work. my arms flail around. idk what to do with my hands. I just exist. listening. nodding. I try to look her in the eyes but my gaze drifts. she instantly realises. ik it makes her sad but I am not in control. its like when u love someone so hard.so fuckin much u dont know how to show it. I had trouble responding. I missed the way we talked for hours before. I let the missed calls pile up. I would be far away from my phone planning on all the interesting convos i would have with her becuz i am scared she would find me boring one day. When we meet up i would try my hardest....my hardest. But her voice cuts me off.
"Why didnt you pick up?"
"I am sorry"
"Thats not a reason"
"I am sorry"
There is smth genuinely wrong with me. I could spend the rest of my life trying to figure it out. but then again. she is gone so what's the point. my smile just doesnt deviate anymore. disgustingly symmetric